Heartache does not mean that I love.
It means that I have lost.
An ancient loss, dressed up in a new cloak,
The cloak of my beloved.
My ancient love, lost in insanity
Left me, ignored me, abandoned me,
When I was innocent and open.
It took me from paradise
And landed me in fear.
Years of wandering my mind and heart
Years of searching for my way back.
The love of my life destroyed by the anxiety inside.
Now he leaves me behind
Tired of the pain,
Wanting more from life and love.
And I ache for him.
Ache for the moments I did not appreciate,
Because of the empty cavern in my heart.
Now it gapes at me everytime I think of him.
And no peace is found in my day.
Unless, I go inside this cave
And find forgiveness for myself and all.
Unless I see myself naked
And only then can I truly love.